Love/Hate Relationship

I know most people hate taking big tests, and I usually tell everyone I can't wait until this thing is over, but truth be told I frickin love it. The feeling I get before taking a big test is the same one I get when I'm about to play in some big sports game or tournament or just about to get in a fight or watch the Ducks go into Game 7 overtime, any big disruptive event with serious goddamn consequences, man, it's like someone stuck a needle in my arm marked "adrenaline" and ran it right up to full power. Gonna be hard getting to sleep tonight.

I wanna high five someone and scream in his face and bang my helmet against a locker until my head hurts and be like, "Bar Exam, I am calling you out! I'm gonna rip your shit open like tornados on trailer trash, I'm gonna board you so hard your kids'll come out woozy, I'm gonna drink your tears, I'm gonna.. fuck! You think you can step a skate onto that rink?? That rink is mine, I own that shit, and your ass ain't nothin but an undiscovered trespasser. And don't think I won't have a springloaded gun set up to protect my property, I make the laws out here and the only one is that I ALWAYS WIN." I hate this test, but man, I love it so much.

I probably could have studied more, but I'm not too worried about it. Lord knows I haven't done crap but twiddle my thumbs and drink alcohol for the past 7 years and I passed most things and ruined the rest. And now this thing thinks it has shit on me? Are you kidding me? One season I led my league in goals, assists, points, and penalty minutes while on defense and picking up defenseman of the year. Multiple times in college I purposely refused to study for tests just to see what would happen, and what happened is that my gpa was more than a standard deviation above the sub-3.0 mean. I used to take martial arts and I got kicked out of two tournaments for being too fucking vicious. I studied for the LSAT for a frickin week and ate that piece of shit for breakfast 'til there wasn't a handful of points left on my plate. Are you kidding me, Bar Exam??

I sometimes end up kinda freaked out and upset after this kind of thing and if it's real serious I sometimes have trouble talking about it, but the feeling before and during, man, there's nothing else like it for me.

I try not to brag much nowadays, so sorry for being annoying and braggarty (if anyone actually reads this anymore), but SHIT! Someone call 9-11 right now and tell 'em to bring a body bag, because I am gonna fuckin MURDER this test tomorrow!! *Bangs head on wall, wall splits*