Obviously you've heard that Sarah Palin is resigning as governor, and presumably you heard her justification of it at her press conference, which was done in her classic dumbass, rambling, trope-heavy style. I loved it so much that I want to apply one of my favorite words to it.
You see, in video gaming circles, we have a little word called "ragequitting". (by the way, I'm officially done putting quotations outside the period, that rule is just too ass backwards). Basically ragequitting is where a nooby (aka new/crappy) player quits an online game he's playing mid-game because he's getting his ass kicked too hard and he just can't handle it, resulting in hilarity for any observers. I'd like to propose that we bring the ragequit into modern American political discourse, because I think it perfectly suits what Sarah Palin just did. I submit that for a resignation to be a ragequit, it needs to be done in response to something the politician couldn't handle, the politician needs to be a n00b, and it needs to be hiiiilarious to other people.
Nobody really knows why she's doing this, and theories abound. She can't handle the ethics complaints, she's racking up too much in legal fees defending herself, she can't handle her kids being attacked, she wants to focus on being a national voice in the leadership vacuum of the Republican party and can't handle also being a governor while doing that, she wants 3 years to prepare for the 2012 election and can't handle also being a governor while doing that, she'd prefer to make easy money on tv than have a hard job like governor, etc. Whatever the real reason, what seems clear is that she quit because there was something about the situation that she just couldn't handle. Prong #1 of ragequit: satisfied.
I don't think there's any doubt that Sarah Palin is one of the least qualified people to ever appear on a major party's presidential ticket; her major competition, at least in modern times, is only Dan Quayle, who at least had his law degree and had been in national politics for a decade before getting chosen to run as VP. And his best retard-quotes are nothing compared to Palin's. Yeah, he spelled potato wrong, yeah he was happy to be in the great state of Chicago, whatever. Palin was fundamentally misinformed about something as basic as the First Amendment; she was worried about reporters infringing her first amendment rights because they were asking her questions! She was asked what newspapers she read so we could get an insight into how she thinks and what kind of sources she values, but really the question was fucking name us a newspaper so we know you have some basic knowledge about the world, and she couldn't even do that! She winked during a serious, nationally televised policy debate! It was crazy! She'd been mayor of a tiny bumpkin-ass town for a few years and then governor of the bumpkinest-ass state in the union for a couple more. Congrats! But whether she's the n00biest n00b in major national US politics ever or just one of them, prong #2 is deeeefinitely satisfied. She is for sure a n00b.
And dude, this resignation is hilaaaaarious. Listen to this speech for just a couple minutes (I mean, if you can). She's not interested in being a lame duck because that's politics as usual? What in the balls does that even mean? And it's also really funny that she's trying to sell her resignation as something positive for Alaska and the country, when all it does is install some unelected dude as governor and change administrations right in the middle of serious serious problems while at the same time allowing Sarah Palin to pretend like she has any chance at a political career after this. I also think it's hilarious that some people on the right are cheering her on, as well as that anybody whose spinal cord is attached thought she was and still as a reasonable politician. Come on! It's 100% hilarious. Prong #3: frickin demolished.
Can we agree this is a ragequit then? It doesn't even matter. Ragequit.
I'm stoked to see that even many people who supported her in the campaign are calling this out for the complete and crazy nonsense it is. And I for one fully support her move; I am totally down with whatever gets Sarah Palin out of my political discourse as soon as possible.
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2 comments:
She just quit because she was lagging, you have it all wrong.
The real question is does she lose experience for quitting mid-match? I'm pretty sure this invalidates her governorship since she quit and takes away like half her mayoral term.
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